What’s going on in that head of mine?

Photo by John Baker on Unsplash

ve always had a regard for poems, reading, reciting, and writing them. “O Me! O Life!” is a beautiful and deep poem, written by the wonderful Walt Whitman, though introduced to me by the forever immortal, Robin Williams as professor John Keating in the Dead Poets Society.

I think everyone exists for a purpose, and it’s just about finding that purpose and working towards it.

I too have a purpose, though what it is, I am still oblivious to. I have in the literal sense written a verse of my life, right now as a kid in grade 10:

My world stands by me,

Yet I walk alone.

For it is I who knows where to go,

It is I, to whom the path is shown.

I am not alone,

Though I am isolated in my void.

I see my path before me,

Yet I walk not, hoping failure to avoid.

I have been told about what Grade 10 will be like, how my life will suddenly change, from hereon. I know what I have to do, how I have to work, to get the life I want. Those who know me keep reminding me, that I need to work hard, to get where I want to, and I know it myself. But still, I know, it is only me who can get myself there. I just feel afraid, that things will never be what they were before, I fear my failure. I fear what could happen if I can’t do what must be done.

I may be over-thinking this, but over time, I’ve realized that if I really want that life, and I am by myself willing to do my best, then I have what it takes. I can do it.

This is the reality, my reality, and no, I must not just accept it, but rather seize the reality and mold it. I figure that this is just part of my life and that in the big scheme of things, what matters are the other things.

I guess this is all a bit vague, but we’re all integral parts of each other’s existence, like gears in a clock. We all have a verse to contribute, and that is our existence itself. Every one thing we do slowly changes the entire system.

I would want to end, saying that life does go on, but what we do with it is what matters. We mustn’t think we’ll lose all importance if we don’t succeed once. We should say to ourselves, as I am saying to myself right now,

“I am…

So, I can.”

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